


how long, how long, how long

by minoiresque



Series: hadesborn. [1]
Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: Other, anyways., can u believe i galaxy brained most of her cahracter arc like five years ago, god i wish my brain was still that iconic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-08 06:02:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21230993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minoiresque/pseuds/minoiresque
Summary: all of the sorrow won't fit in her chest, it just burns like a fire in the pit of her chest; & her heart is a bird on a spit in her chest. how long, how long, how long?





	how long, how long, how long

**Author's Note:**

> tl;dr: the story of my pjo oc, morrigan jeong, throughout the books. she comes to chb in spring & becomes best friends with luke. she grows awfully resentful of percy. luke’s betrayal is a stab in the gut. fast forward to second spring, & she manages to contact luke early summer. she joins him then after being claimed in first december, & works as a spy up until fourth autumn. she begins to doubt her allegiance when kronos takes on luke as a host, & that doubt only grows as she battles in chb’s woods. by the fifth summer, she is sure, yet she still fights for luke because she misses him. by the time the second titan war start, she is a top general that joins in the battle of manhattan on numerous occasions. she is never out without kronos, though, & only appears in battle as he does. by the end, she gains the courage to go against kronos ( silena’s death is part of the tipping point ) & helps the fight by hanging back when he calls for her & ethan to go to olympus; though that only drives monsters towards her. she ends up creating a chasm that sinks much of the army. she passes out afterwards, & is brought to a safe place by hades. ( note that “ first ” coincides with the books, not the years / dates. if it’s third autumn then that means the fall during the year of titan’s curse. morrigan is raised by loving parents yet she runs away after being attacked by her first monster. )
> 
> * a part that’s really vague but is important to morrigan’s character: ethan meant a lot to her. the two of them were exceptionally close as luke's left & right hands, possible delving into romantic tension. he died before anything could be talked about & that seriously hurt her. 
> 
> tw for: death, slight manipulation, brief mention of non - descriptive eye trauma.

➵ born & raised in new york city, she was a bronx kid who grew up loved, albeit a little sheltered. her adoptive mother entered her life when she was around five, & immediately won her over with her kind words & optimistic perspective. though, as lisa likes to remark, eun - hee had rubbed off on her more ( & as was expected. she raised a child through her bitterness, & showed her daughter the truth while teaching her the revolutionary views she held ). _someday,_ _she’ll change the world,_ eun - hee had boasted, over rice & fish. _i just know it._

➵ & her childhood had been like that. loved, safe. yet something felt wrong, felt off; looming shadows & whispering voices that accompanied her throughout the day, the feeling of something that had watched her the moment she stepped foot into middle school. & she was right; something _ was _ wrong, even if it wasn’t in the way she had intended. a calculated plan formed by a monster she dares not name, it had driven her away from home & left her cold & numb on a bus out; _ does reality dare lose itself when i need it most? _

➵ she doesn’t stay alone for long; & later, a kid her age boards the bus to sit next to her. rows of empty seats, & they had chosen hers in the very back. _ i promise you that i’m offering something that will make sense_, they tell her, & she accepts. what has she got to lose now, anyways ? so they switch buses & it’s a rather uneventful ride, but along the way she notices more about them. the shoes on their feet fit loosely, they’ve got extremely hairy legs, & something about their face seems off. she can’t quite grasp it .

➵ she follows them through woods & to a pine tree on a hill, where the words _CAMP HALF_ _-_ _BLOOD _shines out to them. & there they are, whisked away into a camp where she’s promised she’ll never feel out of place in. yet she lies when they ask about your parents; or at least, her mortal ones. she says they kicked her out when she knows they are worried sick about her. chiron looks hesitant to believe her, but she refuses to say anything else on it. so he leaves her be & she returns to her happy bubble, with other kids her age & a story that seems to make sense.

➵ then she meets him. luke castellan, her counselor, & she immediately likes him. spring flies by & she sticks with him, the one friend to count on. even as she grows bitter over not being claimed, even as she shines bright with getting a pegasus to like her, he is there to comfort & applaud her at every second. _ you are a little sister i am glad to have_, he tells her, & she tells him he’s being sappy. 

➵ ( she regrets it, years later. swallows everything she wished she could have told him, the appreciation & gratitude. )

➵ summer comes & she meets percy. he is easily likable & seems as bitter as her, yet she stays wary. something in her says that he cannot be trusted, that he is a danger to her. she waits, eyes him at dinner, loses track of him during capture the flag ( yet she finds that she is quite the fit for a hermes kid with her speed ), & enjoys the campfire up until… he gets claimed. & her bitterness only grows at that, finds herself making a rival she didn’t expect. especially when he goes out on a quest he seems predestined to have, when he gets all the fame & glory for being a big three kid. 

➵ ( she never apologizes, even years later, yet she swallows words that could have been the start of a tentative friendship. )

➵ summer passes in excruciating wait, whispers of _percy this &_ _percy that _ever present in every corner. even luke isn’t immune, & she loathes everyone for it. yet by the end, when she is glad for it to be over, she finds herself horrified that she ever wished it’s end. for betrayal is never sweet, & when percy announces it with a scorpion stinger’s wound to prove it, she runs to hide herself away in her sleeping bag & cries herself to sleep. she dreams of sweet spring days & misses luke more with every passing day.

➵ autumn passes in a blur, yet the start of winter brings her an unwanted gift. right before her birthday she is claimed, marked as a _ daughter of hades _ right under everyone’s noses. chiron goes pale. mr. d looks troubled. the campers are afraid & whispering. & never before has she hated her never present father more, with roiling anger that threatens to tear her whole. she passes dinner to gather her things, tucks the sleeping back under her arm, &… remembers there is no hades cabin. _ there is no hades cabin_, no place for her. where is _ her _ fame & glory? she thinks that night, where is _ her _ acclaim?

➵ she ends up living in the big house.

➵ the months before the second summer, she tries contacting luke. even with the bitter taste of a prophecy chiron had told her, of her importance, she yearns for the once person who had been a friend. who she hopes, desperately, will be her friend still. the first month, nothing. but just shy of june, she succeeds. he is surprised, slack jawed in the mist, asks her _ how_, but instead she tells him of her claiming. of hades’ horrible birthday gift, of the campers’ treatment, of her struggles. & to her relief, he accepts her. tells her to meet up with him in the city, promises her information.

➵ she gets it. his full involvement, the monster army, kronos, the deal he can’t back out of. she tells him _ you can’t, _ he asks her, _ you have anything better _ ? she doesn’t. & he asks her if camp is better, where they sleight minor & dare to sleight major gods, _ asks her if they have built a cabin for her yet_, & she tells him he doesn’t need to play tricks & manipulate her onto his side. she tells him that from the start, she had felt slighted. & so he asks her to be his spy, alongside **silena**. of all people. she asks him how long. he says not long. she eventually agrees.

➵ the next year passes in more of a blur. it grows eventful as luke starts getting all the pieces he needs, yet she doesn’t focus much on the events. she starts to resent silena & her pretty ways, her stellar acting. when she herself can barely keep her own together, where she spends more days hiding & shutting herself in to keep the bitter taste of betrayal out of her mouth. one day she asks her how she does it. silena replies that it’s all for charlie, that it’s easier knowing that he’ll be safe. she grows disgusted._ how could you sacrifice all for one person? _ she wants to cry, but she finds herself no better.

➵ by the start of the fourth autumn, she fully joins luke. he only needs one messenger to get his word across, & so she participates in the nitty - gritty aspects of his plan. she gets the monsters, the funding, the demigods he needs. rallies them together under the promise of a better life, where the gods can’t ignore them. she knows luke means to get rid of them; or is that kronos she senses, hiding just beneath the surface of their dreams? she can feel the titan watching hers, careful. waiting for betrayal, no doubt, because he needs his pawn of the prophecy to tip the tides into his favor. he’s waiting for the perfect moment to seize her mind. ( she has already stumbled once, while sparring with luke sometime between second & third fall. she has mistepped once & nearly lost her eye from it; she cannot risk mistepping again, if not for her sake then for luke’s. )

➵ by fourth summer, she starts to wonder if she has chosen wrong. the final battle through twisting labyrinth only grates on her as luke - but - not - luke leads through. blue eyes are traded for gold & kronos sneers with luke's face. she misses her friend, her real one. she misses the luke she met back from first spring, where may flowers had bloomed under gentle care of demeter’s children. those she now fights against, as she hacks her way through vines & dodges like she's born for the fight. in a way she is, she supposes, but she isn't born to hurt her own. so she takes care to knock them out only, away from other monsters to finish the job. it is her small mercy for those who have hurt her.

➵ by fifth summer, she is tired. she has surely chosen wrong. she is certain as kronos walks with luke’s feet, stares at olympus with luke’s - eyes - but - not - luke’s - eyes. yet she can’t do much, bound to serve as his right hand. still, percy’s arrival on the andromeda is surprising; & beckendorf’s death even moreso, as she escapes last minute with ethan, in tow with kronos. & she swallows words for silena,_ i’m sorry i_’_m sorry i’m sorry i couldn’t do anything._ she is so tired. she wants to escape this war yet she is in the middle of it. as she prepares for manhattan, as she prepares for more death, she swallows words for luke, _i_**_’_**_m sorry you had no choice_. as she fights on the bridge, as she fights against percy, as she fights against people who could have been family, she swallows words, _i’m sorry._

➵ so she defies kronos, during his last call for support. she stands still, with all eyes on her ( & her father, to who she wishes him a bitter thank you for his birthday gift all those years ago ). & kronos is enraged, but she decides that, if he succeeds, she will face his wrath later. instead, she focuses her thoughts on the monsters that threaten to surround her, & she _ fights _ with the last of her swallowed words**_._ **

➵ for all those forced to be a pawn. for silena. for beckendorf. for ethan. for luke. for all the unclaimed.

& she_ prays _ that percy succeeds.

➵ mortals wake up around her, & she knows she must act fast. she dives into her well of power, down down down, as much time as she can snatch out to drive the army down. she imagines a pit so deep that those who fall will greet tartarus, & she

r

i

p

s

the pavement with a fury unmatched, repeating the names & titles in her head. a deafening crack & rumble & she is falling herself. she wonders if tartarus will greet her.

➵ she wakes & it does not.

she’s alive & others are not. 

she is alive.


End file.
